Merry Nothing

It is christmas

The trees are dead

and the snow is melting

Family's are together

Probably fighting

Attempts at bridging relationships are posed

While their neat sweaters make fools of those wearing it

And all the fireplaces in the world are being used just for cheer

But there is no cheer for me

or you for that matter

This is no place for happiness

There is no place for good

Burning cigarettes behind the trees

Kids just want what's in the box

But they never get what they want

Most of the time they don't get what they need either

Others are offended by this attempt to make the world better

It's safe to assume they are disgusted in a family coming together

I however am on the fence

with my spine straight aligned

arms folded over, broken on both sides

While my neck is pinched and poked at by the picket

Oh how horrible it is to be on the fence

To want the both of both worlds

But to end up alone on your own

As long as you're on the fence with me

We can start our own world

And have our on attempts at happiness

Those whom are disgusted have the privilege to leave

And burn in whatever they celebrate

Not to come off stingy, I hope they have the best time a soulless corpse can.

This won't end soon but it will end,

And when it does i'll be at the side of your house with two du-mauriers lit in my mouth.

Time is empty and they're hunting me down..

Suicide Smile

So I cut myself into a thousand little squares

And just as I expected, I won't go back together

My expiration date was up anyways

No exchanges on the body when the body is rotting

Inside this prisoner of dismay

Is a rusted heart, broken and sharp

On call for words and remedies

Never to sleep again

I hope you get everything you want

And it all turns out great

Use the same shovel to find a way out

Misplacing your words

I think you meant me

I was cursed

I'll go drown in the sea

It's intentionally obvious

Stuck between the warm and cold

The only thing I'm having fun with

Is growing old

Cut my skin

And nothing comes out

Look within

You'll see a drought

The weather of my body is a storm

And everything is being destroyed

So don't expect to come back to home

This time, it won't be alright

Not all the painted pictures in the world could show you how I feel

Or how I lack to feel

Take every colour you know

And dilute it

Round it out

Smooth over it

So it's dull

And boring

Lifeless

And then live with it

And I dare you

I fucking dare you

To remember how it was

Remember how the colour was

The colour you loved

That made you happy

Well that colour is dead

That colour is never coming back

That colour should have never existed

That colour is responsible for all of this

That colour was a mistake

That colour was never a cure

That colour should make you cry

That colour is stupid

That colour stabs you in the back

That colour is stale

That colour is old

That colour has no flame

That colour makes you hate yourself

That colour restricts you

That colour will use you

That colour is just a colour

And it breaks my heart so

But I don't want my heart

I never did

I hate it

I hate my heart

I hate myself

Here's your crime scene

Conclusions can be drawn

They usually make a horrible picture though

If you don't hate yourself

Then you will.

Bleeding friends that have nothing to say

nothing

nothing in this world is pure

the air, the water

constantly being poisoned

Children become corrupt

Everything is essential

Excluding your soul

These worries

These hands

We run wild with our temptations

For the worst

And yet they still get the better of us

And we give in against the grain of our being

We make rain on a sunny day

None the less the dark warm guilt is still an important variable to our blood

It's natural for us to feel this way

I mean, how many people actually agree with their decisions?

"Yes, that cigarette does make a difference."

Is the sound of their own salvation drowning in what it's become

But what a fine detective temptation is

It finds what you need to stay away in a second

And it knows that this is what you want

Red transparency

-

In a sweeping moment

When the light lowers it's defense

Maybe another day

Or sunless morning

Whichever is your favour

What's this one called?

Still fond

Aswell Alive

Breathing again

Empty soul smiles

Painting your face inside out

Search the shadows

To take your tongue and tie it around your wrist

And take all you can from what's left

The unwanted

Cold nights in colder sand

Where the day ends softly

The night will destroy

Anything that calls me

Anything that haunts me

Where is this answer

Im reaching out with my hands

As the rain falls from the auburn leaves soon to follow

It is fall and I have lost myself

The sun tries it's hardest to get through the clouds

But sometimes it isn't enough

And the sun is left outside

It could destroy us, had it a conscience

which is a con of science

She wears a necklace of words she can't keep

It's an echoing heartbeat

Scattered down the hall in a pulsating manner

Stitches over your eye

Late fights, bloody fists

Liars and thieves

Limits on pulps to be beaten to

It's dark where I come from

Built on empty thoughts

That may or may not have ever happened

Violet leaves on neon trees

with air so dark, the angels fear

Depth that invites you

Sunset when she rises.

Her hands are shaking

She's never done this before

As her face is painted with the blood inside her

The ravage crimson beneath her milk white skin

Connecting her cheeks to her eyes as if they were stars in the sky

Her tongue, dancing behind her teeth

I'm hoping she needs someone to dance with

If not today, tomorrow

While the time and life are being cut

I only have time to observe other than her

I don't want to give myself away

Tracing her thoughts back to her

While her breath of comfort stabs my heart

I'd like to dissect myself at this moment

So she can see my heart beating

And know that it is there, waiting for her

Plans are made and nights are spent (though they are free as long as no one is watching)

At the top of the stairs

Or the seats of the 'Santa Fe'

In my hands

Or in my head

We already know that coal just burns out

Like the cigarettes falling from the roof

Of all the nights

An evolution proceeds

From my lips to hers

And back to mine

The white walls with the harsh brown overlay

We've exchanged secrets here before

But none told me we'd be here together

Our eyes close

And we dream

And our bodies touch

My hands over hers

My neck, magnetic to hers

Follow the stairs

We end up in the room as crimson as I remember her face during the dissection

Our hearts beat as one

We wake to leave each other

After a mutual car trip of course

She is not seen for hours

minutes

seconds

days

The aching begins

I lose my mind

But at the last minute

Realize she took it by accident

She gives me it back

We go out for a night and a morning

And embrace the rain

A week of preserved emotions is ahead

We live off them like life support

Though we are the O type

So only our emotions can support us

Stone is written in

And names are given

A walk turns into a night so fast

The question comes up

In the cold warmth

Where we've been chasing each other

Though positioned

I am not dreaming

Dreams are a way of escaping reality, I've no need to escape

Another micro evolution occurs

Was it forced

Or was it raw?

Shadows are projected from the eyes at this point

Though the room is dark

Does not mean we have to be

However I choose this

The play is acted out

But before the last scene

I save it from an abrupt ending

Which was of my cause regardless

The thought of her tongue once more being locked behind her teeth hits me

It kills me

I love her so.

What's wrong with me )( Working on a cure

These hours don't belong

So it doesn't matter

when I go or come

It's my decision to live until I die

Nothing pleases

My thought seizes

You're the cause

and the result

I am carved

and mutilated

But you trip on your words

The ones that come from the spot you stand on

Without intention of truth

Have my pores embrace every word you say

Soaking into my soul

Making the most of this eternal chase

I hate everything that was ever something

Anything with meaning means nothing to me

I don't want any of this

And though it was not my decision

I am held responsible

What do you do when the one who holds you drops you

My time in this small room is close to an end

Maybe a year or so

And then my parents, the earth and the sun, will take care of me

Or take care from me

Flesh hitting wood that divides us

The door is the messenger

Now I know of the presence on the other side

I'd like to think I could enjoy the next moment

People from places you haven't heard of.

And it just never stops

Buried and bleeding

And they're still smiling

I'd like to take their faces

Jobs, Hobbies, Ideals

And cram it into one small box

That no one is able to open

The only options available

Are still standing strong

Though the consequence to the action

Is by some called wrong

But I don't care anymore

They've stole my prejudice

My ignorance is painful, not bliss

I don't want to trade my words in

A new deal is not in my contract

I want to keep the ones I know

Why put your words in my head

Just because they're coming out of your mouth

Between your teeth, from your throat

I'd like to grind my teeth on concrete

I'd love to dream but never sleep

Waiting consistently for a change of direction

Instead I just get a rough reflection

When I can't even tell if it's me

But I can't see anything worth to see

So I know the only person it can be

Which leads us to our conclusive ideal that it was me.

The art of regurgitation [Part Deuce]

This feeling

Yes I know

I really want to go

My hands are old and worn

Red, exhausted and torn. AND WITH THIS NIGHT I AM PAIN

From endless promises sworn TO START WITH NO INTENTION OF

The life matches the death's mourn. FINISHING

Long live nothing

and all that is to come from nothing

which is the absence of nothing

(..something)

All of which goes unseen

Copy one thing

Paste another

More or less

She said "I should confess"

But I said "Give it a rest"

And with that final test

Took my spine from between her lips to eyes

I've tasted every reality

Exchanged nothing for something lacking quality

words that only hurt myself.

Whatever is takes

I want it badly

Normal face and body

I'll accept it sadly

But nothing gives in

Nothing works

Until I fall asleep

But changes always happen

Yeah I guess there's hope

That this decreasing graph

We become a positive slope

and everything will be okay

and we'll get to smile

even if it's for a second

But hours and minutes

get along so well

I lost my key into heaven

so i'll wait in hell

until I find it again

under all this dirt

which i guess it's in

Waiting and im waiting

for a beam from the sun

someone made a promise

but directed it to no one

so it's in the air

and i breathe it in

but it's not for me

So I breathe it out tainted

it's carbon dioxide

what have i done

this promise is cyanide

and it's for no one

to keep or sell

i've ruined it all

And angels wings are white

and made of feathers

tied up so tight

each feather is together

but when one comes loose

they all fall away

and you cannot fly

I guess i've learned nothing

from my stupid concepts

i've thought through everything

everything i know except

where we fall asleep

and where we'll wake up

this rush we're in

Walk into your life

on knees that just don't work

I got the wrong ones

So I'll blame the clerk

who sold me them

they're not my friend

but they smiled at the time

Disposable People (When we have time)

Everything you stand for

to me it means nothing

No

You can't have everything

Especially when you want more

Your "deep"

is my shallow

You don't have feelings

So I know im not hurting anything

The world isn't against you

You're making up your own problems

All the words that fly from your mouth

get caught in my ears

and they're filling my head

as to lead it to an explosion

which arguably is this

arguable because i have combusted

but unlike an explosion I have made the slightest indent

48

Paint my face white

Like a ghost

Because I don't know

If I exist

Now she wants to see me

Where can I go

I've burned my homes

The only place left

Is my insides

She hates me, she doesn't want me

And I barely own them

Other people are borrowing them

and they want to keep them

I gave her my feelings and she kept them outside

4 more hours

and i have an airborne home

but i'll have to leave that too

I hate myself, i'm happy my veins are slit

everything ends up as dirt

some sooner then later

by the looks of it I'll be there soon

I thought she was different, no one sees me.

Some extra words so

So I can say more

Curse these invisible meanings

Why am I letting her win?

I can't breathe

Because I am dead.

&

Thinking inside out

waiting for trains

and airplanes

to come crashing down

so i can stay where I am

talking backwards

making words

shouting blurbs

because my tongue

has no rhythm

but everything still makes sense

and everything is still moving

I run away

to tomorrow

from today

no more sorrow

except this bouquet

which i borrowed

from the dirt

but i filled it with hurt

Keeping them inside.

keep yourself calm

you're doing it all wrong

this sacrifice you've made

you wish you never stayed

another useless verse

stolen from her purse

my ribs are hurting hard

but i will not show you my card

the shadow gets large

and the doubt is in charge

personal public show

I know that you know

why do i care

for something that's not there

I can't stand a song on repeat

But instead of changing, i'll accept defeat

I take back my haiku

which you never noticed

the rhyme scheme changes

and you're out of focus

Can't go word for word

Or become self assured

If it's you I save

I might just dig my grave

we must go, we must go

Everything you want to be

I can make you

Everywhere you want to see

I can take you

Situations get fucked up

we're just in one big mess

Situations get fucked up

Get those feelings off your chest

If this door is open

Don't mind if i slid in

if your wounds are open

can I get in your skin

they sold you out

and now you feel like shit

but everythings messed up

and theres no where that you fit

Having doubts

about playing by the rules

building a life

but you're using the wrong tools

i made a bad decision

but i hope it goes well

so stay in heaven

because i deserve hell

I made a bad decision

and now you're with him

suddenly all these

lights seem dim

The art of regurgitation

Heads or Tails

Fits you best

50 percent chance

You're like the rest

I know the cards in your hand

I know your master plan

I'm dull and dark

I'll put out the spark

I could write more words on this matter to give the impression that this is more meaningful but I have said what I have wanted to say. My tongue is mine, and if you ever try to take it away from me I will become sad, shrivel up and die.

Jester rocks

Which has been worse

It's all just a curse

The disease in your veins

It's calls out these names

Am I joyed or with spite

My decisions aren't right

The same as the usual

Problems confuse you all

The difference you can't tell

What am I trying to sell

Depression and thought

In my own webs I'm caught

Shallow words for a deep purpose

Losing the edge beneath the surface

Cut it or not the stain exists

and with that stain, ignorance unbliss

back

and forward

and back

and forward

until your mind splits in half

and then you go back

until every blood vessel is loose

then forward

when every other function has stopped

and back

to when you weren't alive.

Unecessary title number 4

Following someones footsteps

Oh now you have to be sure

So be happy that with all your anxiety

You have found a cure

Do you really want to know

the topic of choice?

Or would you rather

listen to my voice?

A day or a year

I said you'd know

But promise me

You'll keep control

I'm essentially organizing my funeral.

I know no one

but they all know me

crawling up my spine

why can't they see

this turn of events

this storm and stress

my conscious is flooded

im making a mess

your hands are free

and your in my sight

my eyeless face

your smile so tight

Together, away?

Screaming side by side

Does it even matter

When our tongues are tide?

Digging for myself

No warranty on my body

No exchanges or returns

When the body is rotting

Just for the ride

Excited with a frown

Stolen from myself

Sees her own sound

And starts the downhill

You pick up momentum

A story about you

When nobody has won

And we're running in circles

With mistakes and smiles

Never to actually catch the other

But we're both on trial

One colour

and a thousand shades

You're the queen of hearts

And I'm the ace of spades

us

I am the virus

And I kill what I can

I am the virus

Just watch what I'll do

Give me your heart

I'll break it in two

I'll tare it apart

Right in front of you

Hating the soil that built the tree.

This is what happens when you take your time

And use your focus

Nothing

So don't bother trying

Because there is no cure for this one

It's not even diagnosed

But it hits you

And unlike any other disease

It just makes everything else go away

I don't care really

I should but I don't

I know how to do it

I just won't

The floor creeks when you think

I can feel it

But this is naked

And on purpose

and although it doesn't have your favourite words

or typical meaning

It is more then what you're looking for

I don't love you

I don't like you

I don't want you

I don't need you

But you love the barrier,

More then you know.

The blood crawls up my throat

Leaves a trail of error

My stomach is sick

My hands are cold

This bus will never come

I build it up but it just falls down

I sew it in and it comes out

I'm ready now though

I didn't think I could reach my back

But low and behold the knife is there

And I'm to blame.

That's enough reading for you Jessjess.

Mistakes miss takings

I used to kiss her on the cheek

I used to hold her hand

but then I changed and got fucked up

and now im not a man

I made her cry over the phone

I made her all alone

I took the only thing she had

and she has no where to go

I know she loves me but i don't care

Or at least not until now

I threw away the best I had

Not even the rain on the windows could stop us

Reflective and objective

I'm ready to fight

for reasons i don't believe

for reasons that aren't right

Going for a walk

in the late december snow

nothing can be colder

or darker then my soul

I've hurt her so

I made her cry

now inside

i will only die

so suspicious

i've washed my dishes

but still

the dirt breeds deep

October has passed

change is chasing me

im changing

aswell as everything else

turning into things

I never thought could happen

I liked it better when they broke my heart

Should the decision be for myself?

what tears me apart

sleeps deep in my heart

between the ventricles

but undependable

upon request

I can be yours

we act so dumb

under your thumb

with our want and greed

for your attentions deed

trying to call your name

but he's just the same

he doesn't sweat it

he thinks he sees more then he feels

tasting your lips

burning up my cigarettes

saying strong words

i never want to forget

colours on your back

giving me a heart attack

when they just get further

its those feelings that i lack

and though I know you own my neck

I figure i might as well check

since you're getting on your way

and you never want to stay

because im suddenly immature

and you say there is no cure

whilst these feelings do insist

there is much more that i miss

cause I just want to see you hurt so bad

you'd make happy story end so sad

Im calling for you

Im calling for you

From the depths of the dark

I will pull out my heart

happism

Pain is black

I won't come back

Tie me tight

I'm not right

Paint me pretty

I'm so shitty

i've been diseased

you won't be pleased

she hates me

oh i love her

she wants me

to die and burn

cut me deep

im a creep

cracks in the walls

empty halls

too many cigarettes

everything i say is just thrown away

no concept or regard

easier then it is hard

i've thrown away the key

there is no escape for me

but there's reason for you to leave

reasons I still can't beleive

why my soul hurts so

i really just don't know

the curse I inhereit

not david, but derek

the one caught in chains

feeling forgotten pains

no one knows my name

at the end we're all the same

so what's really the lost?

all of them

they leave you

without a feeling of regret

or upset

they just focus on themselves

"it's so hard packing my clothes"

but do they really even think about who they're leaving

or what they're leaving?

no

all they think about is themselves

and no one else

end of summer

The morning of

the night is long

the day I love

is the day that's gone

I can find myself

where no one else is looking

leaving what you love

loving what you leave

it's all the same to me

it's all the same to me

I've left my home

the only one i'll know

and now am alone

without a dime to show

gemini

hey gemini

i see you hiding

as your mind

starts dividing

look at me

forget what they said

is it real?

or is it all in your head?

now it's time

and they are coming

cheers to a life

dedicated to running

and gemini

it's not your fault

i've got the wounds

you've got the salt

so gemini

I'm really sorry

but I know the end

to your little story

gemini

show me that smile

this will only hurt

for a little while

hey gemini

they strap you in tight

you might not see

but they're hunting you down

oh gemini

they're not letting you out

they're not letting you out

they're not letting you out

defeating, isn't it?

You can always tell what the day holds for you by the simplest things

The ones you never notice but ironically, make who you are

Things like what songs you feel like listening to

Which truly understand who you are, and how you're feeling

The ones that know you better then your best friends

When you decide which ones fit

I've always considered music a warm blanket when I was cold

Something you recognize, that instantly makes you comfortable

Just feeling the beat bounce around like a grenade in your heart

The memories they bring, with all your forgotten faces

I go to bed when the birds start chirpin

Unlock the mind

which i seek

in the fields

of unbewknownest

the cards in the factory

stop tripping

res

Comprehend me moving fast then time

Watered down as you watch me unwind

said yes to me

I can feel your eyes pounding on me

as my thoughts race the speed of light

decisions are made

regrets are born

Dig your bones into mine

Smile away the pain you hide

Be vicious like I remember

I see you behind my eyes

I'm going to get you out

Carve like the Carpenter

My ribs are protecting a heart full of dust, old rusted lust

No more sunshine

No more rain

No imagination for the clouds

Today they all look the same

Big and ugly

I'd kill everyone and everything if I had the chance

Mr. Lawyer, quote this; I obviously mean it.

it takes it's tolls

what's unwanted

often controls

destroys

and molds

we buy out

lose souls

you're making me feel like a fool

who's trusted in his demons

rising into the stars

from the ashes

of a once bound human ace

type of kind with a wicked face

leave without a trace

no worries

i'm easy to replace

your one i'd like to taste

haunted laterns full of glory

and the infinite immediate deslocate of what we believe stands the moon upside down with a frown as a face

daisys are dead

feel the eyes of the eerie crowd

in the middle

the ones you don't know

the ones who aren't proud

adrenaline

mountains

fire

scratches

watch us unfold

for the price of gold

and now to continue the false sense of hope

consealed before my chest

there was never a relationship such as this

do your eyes betray you

I didn't want anything

not even you

regardless of how it seemed

do try to beat this

it's all done

fire is stupid and so am i

No one see's

the frustrations

the little confusions

pulsating under my skin

My hands bending into sharp shapes

this anxiety is poison

the sharp bitterness

it's always there

attacking me

it won't let me go no matter what

I squirm

pushing my neck up hoping this feeling won't dominate my body full

but it doesn't work

it crawls into my skull

visions get warm and swarm together

Everything is so inproportionate

nothing makes sense now

she's definately in my system

there's no one to blame but myself

maybe that's why im sad

because no matter what has happened

I could have avoided it

I take comfort knowing

I will forever be a tool of yours

you can use me whenever you want

what I write isn't even poetry anymore, it's just my sadness because I let the only girl i'll ever love get away because i'm an awkward insecure, territorial bastard

let's start here

I'm in love with you

and I've been since I can remember

but I'm not meant for you

It's not the celebrations

the colours or the styles

not when my hair is pushed back

it's just you, that's all i care about.

It's over

and you're gone

this was the last time

I saw your beautiful face

I'll never see it again

I don't ever want to see anything

Ever

I can't believe it

I'll never see you again

EVER

after four longs years

of loving you

killing myself

all for nothing

i'd do it again if i could

i love you soo much

i need you

why have you left me

can't you see im hurt but still breathing

I need this

I want this

I crave this

I feel this

feel so real I forgot to feel

against all odds

i'm not over you

i never will be

i loved you

please just think of me ever here and then

i've lost you

I want to die

And I just might

I'm going to commit suicide

I'm going to kill myself

it's what I've been waiting for

it's all i need

to complete life

the final stage

nevermind

but it doesn't mean i forgot about my love

the one with the smile full of sunshine

the one who made the cup full

she left me

she never even wanted me

she keeps me and calls me thunder

they've been talking about you

they know somethings wrong

we can be like the trees and grow old

punk

It's all gone

Gone somewhere

can you just

Take me there

I am trapped

this spot so tight

everyone

left me tonight

these feelings

disregarded

You're leaving

And here I stand

Four long years

And I'm still no man

the future

makes me afraid

I feel so

Betrayed

Left behind

they forget me

inside i
feel so lonely

whats happening

where are all of you

evolving

wheres my excuse

my option

eat the shotgun

I wont be

missed by anyone

take your time

faster faster faster faster

take your time

faster faster faster faster

Do you think

that your secure

does it feel

like im immature

so what

you're progressing

it's not a

fucking blessing

well, it's sort of like that moment when you wake up although already conscious, and you have no idea what is going on or where you are, but all you know is that it's not supposed to be happening.

minutes, flowers, dew and sadness

So I sat in my room taring myself apart all day and all night just waiting eventually i would realize some things won't live the dead are dead and the living will be dead it's the trend we all follow and so I sat in my room screaming for days and days and days hoping someone would hear me no hoping that she would hear me but she never will I've over watered this plant i am dead to her and she is all i'll ever be so I am dead I go to sleep I never wake up I am smiles

tired from esr

Because of this name

I am to blame

I fight myself every chance I get

Non stop confessions

It was supposed to be my luck

Now all I want to do is be the cause

Pain and destruction

You stole it from my hands

Turned my life into sands

swearing julia

You left me stupid

waiting up to dry

nothings left

nowehere to hide

from my mistakes

you know i have a few

the last one i made

was when i spoke to you

I grew up

I grew old

but i never found out

you weren't told

I'll shut up

i'll go home

i'll live my life

happy being alone

when you spoke for me

is when i learned to walk

there was no one there

no one knew how to talk

you breathed me in

like your cigarette smoke

you showed me something

that wasn't useless hope

You had a good excuse

why you had to leave

my life wasn't for you

you needed a new scene

When I woke up

afraid from my dreams

And here I thought

There was someone to care

but then my dream

turned into a nightmare

You were gone

and I felt so wrong

naked and cold

you watched my life unfold

swearing charlotte

I wake up

I had a bad dream

I couldn't find you

You were so cold

If you have my sweater

Let it stay with you

How holy are hearts were

How we parted

Oh the stars

They tempt me

To create

To destroy

To grow natural

to crack the sky

to rise from soil

and turn into the sunlight

Victory

at last

I can think again

without my past

I stopped for you

I lost myself

I thawed my own heart

I tore my world apart

Our father

Lead us not in to temptation

My only salvation

The root to my creation

Take me with you

If you're really leaving

take me straight through

I don't want to be alone

children

Angels and Demons rage inside

I go into the place I try hide

Where the colours desist

and the darkness exist

Where nothing can be felt

Where snow could never melt

My echoed skulls interior

Where doubt is most superior

I will drag these chains

Down my memory lanes

Yet you remember to cheat

Harm has never felt so sweet

what a wonderful night for sadness

Keep this one low

I have to move slow

I need to get inside

And be next to you

I needed to tell myself

That a day wasn't enough

That I could call your bluff

And be next to you

I don't want to cross

These traffic lights

It's a dark road im taking

for these last couple nights

Do you think you could get next to me?

Do you think you could intense with me?

Alright

Oh no

She's coming up to me

I need to be alone

Cause everytime she moves

she moves me

and everytime shes smooth

she smooths me

stupidness act 1

incomplete

to my defeat

I have been left alone

empty cars

shineless stars

no where seems like home

You were my dream

and i was your nightmare

maddy, say it's time to go

late nights in london

lead you to danger

Staircase, brick wall winding up

Through the castle of dead we fall

Frieghttrain riding late at night

Frieghttrain telling you goodnight

All my memories stand quiet

It's as dark as it gets

I'm standing outside your door

In the rain the thunder roars

So many damaging thoughts

To let go of my memories

I don't want to be left alone

And when everyone leaves

I call nowhere my home

I hate to see it turn vintage

Where were you when everything started to grow old

Were you out trying to find the purpose of your soul

Because I wasn't

I was here alone

Afraid

With no one to help

And you weren't there for me

The only person who could save me

Was the only one who didn't want to

Does this mean I was destined to die?

I've turned my back on my self esteem

I'm wasting life

But they don't care

I'm going down

But they don't care

Tomorrow has no promise

I will miss you all

Goodbye all I love

The words left the old man's tongue

the words that kept him forever young

The man on the moon

Annie can you see me standing outside your door

Annie can you hear me screaming out for more

When I wrap my arms around you

You make everything alright you make me fight

but only one at a time

You feed my all the laws you saw on television

and call it a night

I can't wait wait until I see you

When I wrap my arms around you

lately everything i've been writing sucks ass

Dead on a beautiful day is modern art
From out my chest will crawl my heart
The trail of blood and a razorblade kiss
The day I die is one I won't miss

jenny

because im starring at a picture

I try not to look at it as often as I do

but the truth is, this picture wants me to

The radiation of your chemical smile

poisons me

you're so beautiful

the first pain i've felt in a while

without you there's nothing else to die for

without you i just want it more and more

without you there's nothing else to die for

without you i'll just end up the same as before

rocks and my depression

and theres you

and the one you love

both of you can go to hell

I'm kicking this drug

You don't care about how I feel

You don't care I feel so real

You can dish but you can't take

You don't care I feel so fake

You didn't ask me I didn't know

You are guilty from head to toe

You just want, me out of your way

You never gave a fuck about what i had to say

I could have taken everything you've ever known about you life

but I didn't want to cause you were weak and I don't have the spite

but now you're pushing me into the darkness

I can't breathe

It's time for me

Tribal fires make indiana jones at home

What a wonderful dream

I seem to have found

There's no one for miles

No one in this town

My screams are abandoned

I cannot focus my thoughts

as my body becomes heavy

I consider more shots

It's so lovely that I

have been left all alone

in the center of my mind

I become my own clone

Turn the radio off

I want to hear for myself

These sounds that I make

Shaking dust off these shelves

Now I'm standing trial

For what I have done

Considering the value

I'm now tied to the sun

Open wide and shut closed

these are my confessions

I've lost all but what I've sold

my skin's my last possession

When your eye lids kiss in the night

you think you can see colour

but you have not accepted the fact

that there can be another

I once was a devil

who could not speak

my tongue was strong

but I was weak

Sharper then knives

I cut more then flesh

If you could sin

I wouldn't need to rest

I am awake I am asleep

I made a promise I can't keep

im not afraid of the dark, im afraid of whats in the dark

You want this feeling so bad

A feeling that will last forever

Can I start with a question

that will change your impression

You push this with intention

until you create a tension

Yeah, that's how it goes

you live for a while then get old

Arrange my thoughts on paper

It makes me feel safer

But until I interfere

This pain won't dissappear 

So I'll write out some more

until I wash up on the shore

And my problems go down with the ship

Is this the end? Could this be it? 

my time away from home

I want to be romantic

but romance is dead

The sea salt breathing deep scares me

scattering itself across the land

Am I the song you've never heard?

Am I a song you know but have no name for?

How long have you been waiting for me?

I waited long for this

but such a let down

i've lost all my thoughts

golden and fading

How time passes I will never know

The earth stood silent, how much do i owe?

The competition that doesn't exist is the one i'm winning

only sometimes do I realize these bedtime stories will haunt me

He was a friend I knew not to well

He was a diver and down he fell

When the sky rips open

We can finish our games

If only you saw

when they took me apart

it didn't last long

but they broke my face

Late at night

With my head on the door

one more hit

and im down on the floor

Give me a reason to take away life

Canonaro

If a picture is worth a thousand words
we should have a talk
It's time I open this door
and it's time you learn to walk

Snakes and lovers are crisp
but i've taken a risk
and wrong i've been proved
now my conscious has been moved

They say the sky will fall
Unless the earth can grow tall
be the answer just a metaphor
waiting at your front door

I'm not worth saving

I want to be your first and last

be the one you remember when you're old

when you're thinking to the past

when everyone else is sold

Take you away from your pain

you said you wanted to play a new game

well you can get a highscore with me

You're a forest of trees

each with memories

of when they were young

their lives just begun

some one's carved their name in you

and you just cant get it out

they say it hurts for ever

no matter how loud you shout

You can be the fire to my sea

we'll burn for an eternity

between the hours of day and night

you toss you turn you burn you fight

and you wake up alone to your shadow

You've torn yourself in two

because you know you can't be true

there's a devil stopping you

from doing what you have to do

you compete with your friends

cause you know there comes an end

when the right reasons are wrong

but you have to stay strong

because metahpors told you so

You're the sun to my world

you give me light

If you're paint im a white wall

waiting for you to drip and fall

and give me colour and taste

but i'd just turn you into waste

take what you can get

leave us and forget

Change like the cameleon

You're unstable and unfit

you know how to take a hit

and you give it all up

At my distant hope of someone hearing me

still after all this time

you pull me under

My only dream has finally come true

I've met the day I won't dream of you

You will be

He's already drunk asleep

Have you ever seen a flower that didn't come from a seed?

We keep straight faces, but that's all we can keep

How much longer do we have until we go

Happy until the clock counts down

Let me soak into the sound

my lies lie to me so it has to be the truth

I'm going to take you with all I have

She's says shes never felt better

Why does this hurt so much?

She seeps through my pours like a poison chemical

she dilutes me, takes away my life

I'm not used to letting her go

from this body to your soul

this hurts and you know

With the exception of young love

I am to be found the fault

to my own troubles

You planted you seed of hate inside me

you watched it grow viciously

and did nothing but bathed in your success

You are a river made of led

The song stuck in my head

the feeling when you know you're dead

a little bit of nothing I decicded to call myself

When I look around I don't want an excuse for your lates

When I look around I expect to know how you taste

I will always be nothing

Just a slave to your wants

It hurts to watch myself be used

But I need you

You're the soul that makes me wait

The love that makes me hate

Hunting can be fun if it's with love and knives

There is a cut deep inside

There is a cut I cannot hide

Beneath the skin of this young boy

Is the heart of an old man

About to die

I have thoughts plenty of my life

and what you have done to it

I witnessed you destroy me and did nothing

I am guilty of suicide even though I live

The ink I don't use makes me want to stop

and frown at the world for what it is

but i am not strong

I have no spine to push the weight of my decisions on

and for that I am punished

my tongue is tied and you've given me a moment to say the words I want to

Come walk with me

Feel my heart

Inside my mind

You sleep

Unlike me

I am awake every moment

Until you love me

I will not sleep

I don't want to dream of you

and dissapoint myself

I want it all

I want you

snakes and lovers

Lets play a game like were kids again

what about the one when you say you're my friend

You'll be the boat that sank all my dreams

and i'll still love you despite what it seems

Ship me down the river so I can meet someone new

Maybe this person won't hurt me like you

But don't you forget that I was your mistake

I want to be the one that makes your heart break

Not the last but it feels like it

My anger pulls what is inside out
Nothing can hide when it is near
Safe is a lifetime away when I'm hurt
I wish I didn't feel this way
But there are chemicals I can't control
No one can control them
And they react only with yours
Oh the temptation is right on time
You know
When everything is planned and moral biding
that is when temptation enters
Temptation is the water to the seed

I think I may have drained my own soul
There was a leak in my body and now Im gone
Peace

Inside-out buildings on fire make me stop and think about the good times

I created the cup
and filled it half full
I made you drink it down
I made you pull

From all the indifference of my surrounding
I can be found out of place
I'm not anything
I'm not your faith

Can't find my home

I destroy what I create
Yours is mine to desecrate
Under your skin I explode
I am the tempt to take this road
I am what you call a perfect flaw
With your pain, my heart will thaw
I am the earth I am the sea
I am the reason that you bleed

My memory makes you wait
You'll never ever feel this great
Cocaine is what I breathe
But Heroin is up my sleeve
And If your sadness keeps you awake
Then your heart deserves to ache
But remember I'm in her soul
And that means I'm in control

50 means nothing to me

You said i'd be free by now
But you were lying
But you lie so well
Your secrets are mine to tell

why should 50 mean anything to me
it just shows how unfulfilled my life is
how no matter who im with, im alone
I still haven't found
what I lost
Or never had

description to the answer

You think you're a big shot
hey


I'm underground
In your soul
for yours to know
now believe me
its only what you think
An angel says he's passed from heaven
to hell

I've cast out my last curse
now i will be in the heavens for eternity
I'm still waiting for the worst
She won't let me worship her divinity

You say love can save a life
But what if it can't
I've given my time to a christ

There's a devil that's got my soul
She makes me break my heart
But what see doesn't know
Is i'm taring her apart

Take brace for winter

I battle the night without you
I can't tell what's not false or true


Scream at the sky
And one day you'll disappear
Take away your pride
take away your fear

You are the Light, I am the Shadow

On this morning
I have learned that I am nothing
And I will never be anything
It is impossible
I was just made wrong
I will always hate myself
No matter how much anyone can love me
This is what it feels like to be dead
To have the life inside you spark for one last moment
and then become dull

I once was a fire
but eventually I just burned everything
And now nothing is left
What is my purpose?
I need to learn how to rebuild
But i'll just end up destroying
That's what i was meant for
Destroying everything

With my best efforts
I will crawl away

I am a shadow
I can only be seen when there is light
Without something so pure
I cannot exist

There is no such thing as deep
There is only as much as you want there to be
Your saturday is my sunday
I'm just waiting to go back
all day
everyday
that's what we were built for
Life is very cruel

The snow will be here forever
It melts occasionally
But it always comes back
Colder then ever
And we let our creations take this
So we can be cozy and warm

We should all die
Everyone of us
The old, the young
The rich, the poor
The happy, the hateful
Fathers
Brothers
Sisters
Mothers
Neighbors
Teachers
Doctors
Thieves
Cheats
Lovers
Enemies
Everyone

We are a snake eating it's own tail
All we are is a cycle of destruction
And this is nothing new
We'll never change
Everyone is selfish
They just want everything
And when they can't have everything
They make a fuss
They make someone else's life based on their own
The earth will never be pure
You want attention and power

This is one of my cries for humanity to save themselves
But it won't happen
Because they won't bother to read this
They'd rather develop plans to hurt each other
And take what they want
Without regards to others
Humanity is a failure
Maybe i'll try back in a hundred years to see what has happened
But I know it won't be any different

glass

On a sunday
the morning of
dissapeared
all around the world
stars turn into rats
turn at the end of the world
hid disguise in coffee
determined to reveal all the secrets of the girl
who broke away mid-july
But then we all decided
then we never collided
and we were life
or greater
deep thick skin surrounds me
maybe

Yours truly,
the letter was dead
the chill hit end
the note was over
and she went in



Not to loud but loud enough

A sharp right turn
and she's ready to burn

Found your skin empty
with eyes running wet
it's these days of your life
you can't forget


Create and forget

Fix the glass
you're so good at it
you break everything else
and then you quit

Fix the glass
see that horse that rode in
well it's taking you home
get out from under my skin

It's so low

Questions are only good if you want answers

I think i know when im wrong
when she takes what i say
and is still strong

I think i know when to doubt
when she breathes in my hate
and coughs it out

I think i know im afraid
when i realize
it's been a decade

take it on, until you're gone

password

http://www.supernova.com/shows/2108/vote

L5C 1J2

the things i need to make it through the night

I can taste the last words i said
yes, the ones filled with hate
i didn't mean them
I try not to
But sometimes i have to show my realness
all of my hate
i can't hold it in
it hurts when you have to tell this to someone you love

what do i really need
I have no future
im a bum
a fucking
retard
doing nothing
what
what am i going to do?
Get fucking famous and never have a care in the world?
No matter what i do
i can never sleep
i just want to sleep
forever
and ever
nothing but dreams
only sleep

dfhdfh

What is happene
shaun was here but now he's gone
your the reason
yo ur the reasom
your always were
hoping this makes my horrible life go faster:D

everytime my heart calls disaster
everytime mind goes faster

Until we disappear, I will remain the lyrics that stick out of your favourite song

I await you
outside and cold
some say im bitter
but im just alone

You've been watching all night
do you have a verdict
In one slow move
you'll crush and burn it

Souless and gentle
you just can't let it go
you're holding on tight
but not enough to know

if you keep your eyes fixed
I'll play my hand like a smile
the second you don't look
i'm in denial

Sweat out all your evil
if it makes you feel good
I'm not going to stop you
even though I could

It's not a crime
if i cover my track
the one thing you need
is the one that i lack

I've got seven stupid reasons
why im dragging you in
one of them being
im just losing to win

You can convince yourself to do
something you hate
at the end of the night
you just make her wait

you leave yourself open
just waiting to die
so say the things that hurt
cause it'll make things alright

a touch on my arm
tells me to say goodnight
you're asleep in my car
you pass beneath the light


It's been 5 long weeks
since you last called it quits
You find a new direction
and you take some more hits

You fight for every second
until you call it a year
you take a deep breath
and you disappear

I look around the room
and i see your face
I know how you look
But not how you taste

I end up next to you
I give my heart a break
It looks as if im happy
but really it's fake

Is this all just a game
that you've played before
I'm willing to bet
im your high score

all the stores are closing
and it's 9pm
you still can't tell the difference
between me and them

your love makes the demons come out at night

im a fool
in a world of dreams
no one can save me
nothing can help

surrounded by my own decisions
all my mistakes
i bathe in my attempts
to call you in the midnight mist

everything i am i owe to you
for better
or
for worse

it reminds me of the taste i promised not to forget
until i had life to be wasted
like in the old days of us
where the sun shun through the night, mine at least

it's not fair to say you didn't give me a good ride
but i just wanted it to last forever
is it so bad to want another chance
sew my heart onto yours so these inside out words can make sense

dont feel so bad
you did as you thought
I watched you struggle
but i couldn't pull you out

be what you need to be
and fly away from me
come back and show me your wings
and let me be with you

I want you to take me to the level you're on
i don't want to battle the night alone anymore
i just want us to become one

oh just because your not the same
doesn't mean we can't evolve together
you're blind but you can borrow my eyes
they're no use without you anyways

These words aren't much of a defense
I just wished you loved me

I meant to help the girl, but she wouldn't let go.

nobody knows the pain
when the one you love
will not accept you

they don't understand how hard you've tried
they don't see you're willing to do anything

The past just seems to be stuck in them
even though it wasn't your fault
I did what was right
I did what made sense
No one was supposed to be hurt
But you took it like a knife and stuck it in your back
saying i did it

I don't want anything now
because i lost my best friend
although we can look at eachother
it's not quite the same as knowing
you want me around
because i want you

knowing this probably won't change anything
these are the feelings i keep inside my heart
the place where i wait for you
to come back to me
so we can live again
and i can be free :(

nobody knows my pain
the pain i hide
the pain that makes
everyday hopeless

Please don't keep the feelings i'm giving to you in a box in the dark and cold, under your bed
because i fear they will die

These may be the last months i'll have the chance to see you
Time is moving and you've found a way to stay in the same moment
where I hurt you
I'm giving up everything
selling my spine

I just hope
that you hurt too
so we can still have something in common
if not
i hope the rest of your life is good
and that whatever i did wrong
never happens to you again
but know that
i will always need you